Why can't you EFFING leave me alone. Seriously..GO TO HELL!!! earlier pleaseee
!#$%?@$%#!!#*%?#@*%!*$*#*!#* || posted by Lenig

I've failed to believe that I deserve some happiness..Whenever I think that I've enjoyed today, when night falls, I would worry and fear that something bad, something that has plagued my life since young

I've failed at building friendships that will stay in people's hearts...

So what if I din fail my exams? I failed as a person. || posted by Lenig

Maybe A lvls shouldn't end..
Maybe the aftermath isn't as happy as it would seem
So many things to do..so many things might happen..
Changes, embrace it or keep it at bay || posted by Lenig

I think its time to take stock of where my life is heading. Basically, I've got no life. Everyday I spend in school is so lifeless. Study and homework. Weekend, slack. Which makes me feel guilty. This is what education had gotten out of me -.- Weekday, reach home, then cmi and sleep. Then stayed up late to do homework. Sometimes, during weekend I wonder how I lived through my weekdays. It's going so fast...and pointless.

I just wished it would be holiday everyday, at least I can go slow and less contact with the outside world. No contact, no conflict. =) || posted by Lenig

有人说：只要是钱能解决的了的问题，就不是问题。

但是，如果钱就是问题，那该怎么解决呢？

为什么我的快乐那么短占？

为什么我每天睡醒都要听到妈妈骂他没良心，把皮包里的钱都拿走了。

为什么一到晚上，我就要开始担心他又会回来发脾气。

有钱也吵，没钱也吵。

我常常吵说妈妈偏心姐姐。。前一阵子，妈妈竟说出：我知道你一向来都不喜欢我！整天发脾气骂我。你比较喜欢你爸爸嘛。

听了之后，我第一次知道什么是真正的心痛。

我怎么可能不喜欢我妈妈？？我是那种半夜做恶梦，梦到妈妈离开我会大哭的人。不能没有妈妈的人。会发脾气，因为我以为只有妈妈会不放在心上的原谅。

看来，我错了。

但是，不要误会。我一点都不喜欢爸爸。他只要在家，我就会讨厌出房门。我是可怜他。我常常会逼自己想他有什么好处。因为我不想像姐姐一样恨他。这样太可怜了

可是，我却被我最爱的妈妈误会了。那是多痛苦的事。

妈妈只看到姐姐受了伤害，那我呢？

我算幸福了，姐姐还得背负着养家的重担。靠他？难了。。

没有爸爸会比较好吗？

2009年的最后几天，过得一点都不快乐。

2010年会不一样吗？ || posted by Lenig

Spend my x'mas eve with yj frens at joleena's house...She's a christian which gave me totally new experience. Took pics and played cards! Great. But I missed out on the sec sch gathering..
I learnt how to play slapjack which was apparently too late and I lost the game..ended playing truth or dare, but nobody could think of a question that they soooo desparate to know about me!!!hahaha

Food was nice but mostly beef which I cannot eat..so sadz the lasagna and spaghetti..but enjoyed the choco fountain and eveything else that is not beef..lol

Wanted to go home at 10pm already but due to peer pressure, delay until 10ish..haha at least I never succumb under it..

Cool party.



I didn't know being in a broken family would have such an impact on me. I just don't want to leave my mother at home alone..I dun wan her to worry about me like she did for my sis..At least I want to be home for them..That's why I want to go home early. Sorry my friends, that's the reason, ur are pressing for... || posted by Lenig

|| posted by Lenig