Recently, heard from Bei er that she's having some family problems and quite unhappy about that but it seems that It didn't affect her much when she's in school, so good for her loh. But as for me, It's the same old problems again. But I think this time it was really overboard.Before, it was like when they(my mum and sis)were talking, I was not allowed to talk,make unnecessary noise or block their view on each other and most importantly,if I appeared to be angry(coz they talk for v long without stopping and I only got a v short question to ask), my sis later will come to my room and at least ask me what was I trying to say just now.This I can accept for they say they are talking about serious matters and mine had always been thought as stupid questions.Now,my that little amount of freedom to talk was taken away...Ever since my sis went to work, everyday she came back home from work, she has loads and loads of things to tell my mum and I'm not allowed to interrupt their conversation of important matters.I accepted that and in between intervals when they stop for a while,I tried to pop my question out as fast as I can but one of them would start talking again and begin to ignore me.What I hated most was to be interrupted when I was talking,I seriously hate it and all of them knew but just insist that theirs is more important.Thats not the limit yet.After they finish their talk,they would go back and do their own things.My sis would close her door and do her things and when I asked her a question, she would say she is not free for my only one minute question.But all I see was a msn chat conversation going on the monitor...I know shes having problems with her work but why am I suffering with her..I'll let it go if she was polite but she was not!All the teachings she gave me were thrown aside,only she can be rude to me and not me.On that particular day,she was getting ready to go to a ball and wanted me to help her shoot some photos for her coz she was very well dressed that night.I took some photos and showed it to her..you know what she said to me? She said why not nice one and say I SUCKS(for many times)!I didnt want to spoil her night by rebuking back but juz laugh it off and find a excuse to leave...this time,i did not shed a single tear.I'm successful in creating a cold blooded me.Since young,she has said all those hurtful words to me but I accepted it becoz she is my sister,only sister.I shed tears before but from now on...never ever

Next problem was that ever since the very disappointing oral exam, I'm beginning to the bottom.What I mean is that I got this bad feeling that I will not do well in everything, my confidence is done...I don't know how to find it back.I've been so unlucky since and the feeling was that God has gave up on me..he doesn't want to help me anymore...maybe,I won't get into pure science class or I will fail history and all the bad things will fall on me and pushed me down!Nobody knows me in this world, I just want to be alone...I think I'm getting depression but It will go away soon coz I'm a born happy-go-lucky person mah...ya that's all || posted by Lenig